Breaking free from addiction
For decades I’ve struggled with some self-sabotaging behaviors. Things like over-snacking, staying up too late, excessive scrolling and TV-watching. I know these habits are keeping me from being truly free and happy, and yet they’ve had an unbelievable grip on me. So, let’s call it what it is - addiction*.
I had tried lots of habit-busting strategies like journaling, therapy, working on just one habit at a time, being hard on myself, being gentle with myself. Each strategy was somewhat effective, but none enabled me to truly overcome the addiction.
Childhood trauma and being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) have played a big role in why these habits formed in the first place. (If you’re highly sensitive like me, check out my free resources for Sensitives and Empaths.) And I know that when a thought or behavior is repeated over and over, a neural pathway forms in the brain which makes it super-easy to slip into that pattern. Think of it like your favorite short-cut through the woods. And we have to repeat the new thought or behavior several times to form a new neural pathway. That can be challenging.
But I also know that I’m a spiritual warrior. I’ll do the deep soul work, and follow the breadcrumbs laid out by my Spirit team. Recently, a theme kept popping up in my life, over a span of several days. (💡 Tip: When we notice a theme repeating in our lives, it’s quite likely our higher power is at work focusing our attention on something so that we can be peaceful and free.) And it led me to wonder - what if the grip these addictions had on me wasn’t completely explained by things like neural pathways, brain chemistry and childhood trauma? What if there was more to it?
The theme that kept popping up was about dark energy. Some spiritual thought leaders believe that when we are spiritually ascending, shadow energy will try to hold us down. Honestly, I’m still figuring out what my beliefs are on this whole topic of shadow energy, but I know it doesn’t have to mean anything big and scary. It can simply mean a dense emotion like fear or shame. A shadow just means the absence of light. And I believe that light is love. And there is no energy more powerful than love. Every Harry Potter movie we’ve ever seen shows us this. Light and love will always win.
So instead of this notion of a dark energy making me feel scared, it lit a fire inside me. The warrior in me went to battle. I squared myself and announced, “You will not win. I will always choose light and love. Always.” And I realized the power is in the choice itself.
Free will is a precious gift and a universal law that cannot be broken. We are free to choose our beliefs, our actions, our thoughts. We are free to ask for help from God/Spirit/the angels…or not. By choosing love, no matter how difficult the circumstances, we are aligning with our true soul essence - love. We’re basically announcing again and again which team we’re on. And we’re affirming that we will not buy into that other nonsense that can keep us down.
And now, this realization - ‘the power is in the choice itself’ - is often in my awareness. When I start to feel the grip of the addictions, I most often choose self-love. And the grip is losing strength. After decades of struggle, it has suddenly shifted. I am breaking free.
I once had a spiritual download on why things have to be so challenging on this planet. I was shown that when we are presented with really difficult circumstances, and still we choose love, we are essentially transcending and transforming dense energy into light. The transformation happens through the act of choosing. And each time we do this, we ascend and it helps the collective consciousness to ascend. And this is our contribution to the planet. The power is in the choice.
My wish for you is that maybe you got one nugget in this post that you can hold onto. Maybe you’ll keep it in your pocket, and pull it out someday when you’re presented with a really difficult choice. And maybe in that moment, you’ll choose love. The power is in the choice. 💛
*Addictions that are ruling your life may require support from a licensed professional. Please don’t go it alone and seek appropriate help. Your life is waiting.
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